Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Confused and tumultuous while in a rut

I love ruts.  Being in a rut is sometimes the only feeling of order I have in  my life. 

It can be a rut of activity;  a bout of reading, drawing, jewelry-making, blogging.

It can be a rut of ideas:  psychology and counseling, Judaism, or other ideas

It can be a rut of routine:  a daily/weekly/monthly/yearly schedule I adhere to.

But sometimes the ruts end abruptly and I'm twisting in the winds while lightening strikes.

And then, everything and nothing is attractive.  Structure is gone.  And I feel existential angst.


  1. Nothing wrong with ruts as long as we are open to VOLUNTARY change and able to cope with change that comes without our say so. No one much likes change, that's true but we have to rock and roll with it. Sometimes it's baby steps that we impose on ourselves to facilitate the ability to change.

  2. I've come to recognize Boredom as my biggest nemesis. When I'm under its influence, I'm frustrated, cranky, and generally miserable. I'm not much fun to be around when that happens. Overwhelm is the next culprit that steals my peace of mind and sends me searching for an escape route - parachute optional. Both indicators that the pendulum has swung to far to the right or left of centre and it's time for me to get back in balance.

  3. I'm with you, Neora. I used to love change, and now it's very disruptive and I just don't like it. It seems like the last couple of years have been full of all kinds of changes for both you and I. I think we both deserve some security and peaceful time, don't you?

    Have I told you how very proud of you for having your bat mitzvah this summer? You did it. I knew you could do it.


  4. Change.

    It's I get older, some days change is a welcome thing--keeps me on my toes and life interesting; other days, it's jarring and disruptive, at which time I have to remind me that I needn't sweat the small stuff--and it's oftentimes mostly small stuff.

    I guess one of the good things about the occasional bout of rough times is that it keeps us humble and able to better appreciate the good times.